Thoughtless? Sounds nice

My mind is plagued with randomness. At any giving moment I can feel like taking on the world and the next hiding from it. Emotions can run rampant or can absolve completely. My train of thought can maintain rationally or derail into irrational carnage. At moments it can sound as loud as an orchestra while at other times it’s as simple as the silent ticking of a clock. Despite the vast difference in my cognitive condition, my brain never reaches ground zero. By that I mean for me there is never an off switch, or even a pause button.

Speaking of pauses I’ve already taken to long I don’t pay attention I’ll end up getting off the bus at the wrong stop. I still have to hurry home and get my homework done, you know what they say, there’s no rest for the wicked.

Randomness is anything but interesting; in fact it’s mostly exhausting. It’s easy for me to wrap myself around such a simple concept and then twist it till I can clearly see both sides of the argument. Normally this would be great if it weren’t for the fact that I have completely lost track of any solution. A mind that can find validity in both sides is lost to itself. It’s times like these I wished for a wave of indifference; at least then I wouldn’t care where my head was or which side needed choosing.

Crap! I forgot to take notes in class today. Damn it! I swear I was paying attention, at least during the parts I was awake. Now I’m going to have to finish my assignments merely from the book. Oh great it’s the one that gives me both sides to every story. I hope my brain is up for the challenge.

Chaos isn’t always all bad I suppose. When things ramp up to a level in which my very existence swirls around me like a dust devil caught in a tornado, I tend to burn out. Everything seems to move slower and thoughts I once had seem to drift off. It’s almost like everyone seems to function better after a nervous break down then while one is occurring. My thoughts are like a four-way intersection, after a large crash, everything stops and then starts up again only slower and with a little more guidance.

Finished! But did I do it right? I must have done it right. Right? It doesn’t matter I mean come on it’s this late already and I really don’t have time. On the other hand I could still stay up and… Ahhh screw it! I’m going to bed I’ll deal with the rest in the morning when everything has slowed down.